Tuesday, December 16, 2008

To the K-blog!

I've restrained myself for far too long, snickering to myself in the corner and not sharing the lolz with you fine people... well, both of you. No more. Because today's story? Takes the cake.

yes, this cake.

You see, Once upon a time in Holland Township, Adolf Hitler wanted a birthday cake.

This was little Adolf Hitler Campbell, of course, who is turning three-- elder to his sisters, JoyceLynn Aryan Nation Campbell, and Honszlynn Hinler Jeannie Campbell (I imagine this is a mispelling of 'Himmler'-- which would make this even more, as the kids say, "fucking epic"). The best part?

"The Campbells turned down the market's offer to make a cake with enough room for them to write their own inscription and can't understand what all of the fuss is about."

Weak. You knew this would happen when you named your kids, you dumb fucks! Don't feign ignorance of the likely reactions of pretty much Everyone Ever... while I'll admit, this whole debacle shows a lively amount of ignunce, you're not fooling anybody. This isn't about how sad it is that your poor little kid doesn't get a cheap storebought birthday cake inscribed how you'd like. Check Cake Wrecks-- this is not as uncommon as you'd think. They're just lucky Shop-Rite didn't choose to be more passive-aggresive about the whole thing.

And then there's this:

The Campbells said they wanted their children to have unique names and didn't expect the names to cause problems. Despite the cake refusal, the Campbells said they don't expect the names to cause problems later, such as when the children start school.

...so never mind. These parents? FAIL at parenthood. Definately fail at public school. I see that they're hardcore devotees of #101 on the list of things white people like: being offended. First-Amendmentlol! edition.

And more commentary here. Though really, they ought to have disallowed comments, because the whole thing is godwin'd before it begins.

All of that said, what really... well, you see, these people? They are both on disability, one for Emphesyma, one for a bad back. So they don't work, they just collect social security. Can you guess what this would have meant for them during the Reich? How happily the German Nation would have carried these people who were not contributing anything to the Fatherland, instead expecting handouts?

I knew you could!

Now, Das kainenchen is more of a Socialist these days than a national socialist, so I am fine with social programs... but please understand a philosophy before you expound it. The Reich would not have loved you. It would have burned you. Sorry. Now this is coming from a corpse whose existance is, at this point, a steaming hot stream of horse piss in the cornflakes of racial purity. My salt grains, they are free.

As the random psychologist in the article says, "The problems the children might encounter in school, [Gordon] said, "would be icing on the cake."

Ain' it jes?

And all of that said:

Happy Holidays!

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